The passing of a loved one is a personal experience. During the middle of grief, creating an obituary can feel like a daunting task. But this announcement serves a significant purpose: it informs others of the death, honors the life of the deceased, and becomes a lasting record for future generations.

This guide offers step-by-step advice on how to write an obituary for a family member, ensuring a respectful and informative tribute.

Planning the Announcement

Image by freepik | Consult with service providers for expert guidance on writing obituaries.

Before putting pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard), consider these initial steps:

• Consult with Service Providers: Funeral homes or similar services can offer valuable guidance on obituary writing. They may even have templates or online platforms for creating and sharing digital obituaries.
• Gather Information: Collect details about the deceased, including their full name, age, residence, birth and death dates, and any service. Reach out to family and friends for anecdotes and memories that paint a complete picture of their lives.
• Determine Budget and Placement: Newspaper obituaries come with a fee, so decide on a preferred length (short or long) and publication platform (local paper, online obituary site, or a combination).

Writing the Obituary: A Step-by-Step Approach

Image by EyeEm on freepik | Follow a systematic approach while writing an obituary.

• Start with the Basics: Announce the passing by stating the deceased's full name, age, and hometown, followed by the date of death. You can mention if the death was sudden or after an illness, and include the location (hospital, home, etc.) if desired.
• Weaving a Life Story: This section is a chance to celebrate the deceased's life journey. It can be a brief chronology of their major achievements or a more personal reflection on their character and passions.
• Consider the Tone: There's no single "right" way to write this section. A straightforward recounting of facts works well, but you can also incorporate a more heartfelt or humorous tone, depending on your loved one's personality.
• Highlighting Accomplishments: Include details about their education, career path, and any notable achievements. Mention their hobbies, community involvement, or religious affiliations to showcase their well-rounded life.
• Acknowledging Loved Ones: An obituary recognizes family members, both living and deceased. Here's a suggested order:
  • Spouse or partner
  • Children and their partners (listed as "Child (Partner's Name)")
  • Siblings and their partners (optional)
  • Grandparents, aunts, uncles, or close friends can be included here as well.
  • Consider mentioning the number of grandchildren or great-grandchildren, even if you don't list individual names.
• Sharing Service Details: If there will be a public memorial service, include the date, time, location, and any other relevant details (e.g., name of the funeral home). If it's a private service, state that.
• Memorial Donations (Optional): Many families choose to suggest donations to a charity or memorial fund instead of flowers. If this applies, include the charity's name and any necessary contact information.
• Proofreading and Fact-Checking: Obituaries become a permanent record, so accuracy is crucial. Proofread the obituary , enlisting a trusted friend or family member to double-check facts and ensure a smooth flow.

Additional Tips for Writing an Obituary

Image by freepik | Online platforms offer enhanced obituaries with photos, videos, and e-books for sharing memories.

• Embrace Collaboration: Writing an obituary for a family member can be an emotional experience. Don't hesitate to seek help from family and friends who know the deceased well. Their contributions can enrich the obituary and ensure a well-rounded portrayal.
• Focus on Positive Memories: While acknowledging illness or hardship, the focus should be on celebrating the life lived.
• Consider Length Constraints: Newspaper obituaries often have word limits. If space is limited, focus on the most essential details and memorable anecdotes.
• Digital Sharing: Many online platforms allow for extended obituaries with photos, videos, and guest books where loved ones can share memories. Consider these options to create a more comprehensive tribute.

By following these guidelines and drawing on cherished memories, you can create a meaningful obituary for a family member that serves as a lasting testament to their life and legacy.